Bill P. Godfrey et al

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Welcome Bub and Thyiad.

The more observant of you will have noticed two more names listed on the right. Welcome.

"Al" is getting bigger every day.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Health care for the terrified

For those of you who don't know, I am 34 with a pathalogical terror of doctors, nurses and hospitals.

Allow me to give you a small precis:
  • In 1985 my sister trapped my right hand in a car door. I never saw a doctor for an xray or to have the fingers rebroken and bound the fingers together myself. One finger is still so bound to give it support.
  • I have never had any immunizations - I loathe needles.
My previous visits to doctors over the past five years:
  • An asthma attack so bad that the doctor I called sent a paramedic ambulance for me.
  • Tonsillitus so bad I couldn't breath through my mouth (I have never managed to get enough air thro ugh my nose)
  • Tonsillitus four times in four weeks
  • If antibiotics was available over the counter, I wouldn't have gone either time.
One other incident that I won't go into but it was bloody unpleasant and I now have a private doctor who will send me pills through the post so I haven't got to visit a doctor.

Are you still reading? I admire your stamina.

Anyway, I am not a morning person and usually in between staggering to the kettle and feeding the cats, I used to snivel a bit and was fine for the rest of the day. About eight months ago, I noticed hat it felt as if my nose was permannetly. As first I put it down to my third/fourth bout on concurrent tonsillitus but it wouldn’t go so I mentioned it while getting antibiotics. I was put on a waiting list to see an ENT specialist in November 2004.

Oh, did I mention, I stop breathing during the night?

Anyway on March 5th 2005 I got to see an ENT doctor. The looked up and then did something called an endoscope. It is basically a camera on a tube. First they spray a anesthetic up there (basically like sniffing a Vicks or Beconase) and then start feeding a camera through. I have to say this didn’t hurt at all and the only slightly unpleasant thing was it felt as if I had something stuck in my throat afterwards. (Kept making me want to swallow.) If you are a wimp don’t worry it is fine.

Then I got sent for a MRI on March 17th 2005.

Now at this point I will say I started freaking big style. I HATE HOSPITALS. I particularly hate the local hospital. It’s is a shit hole full of time wasting morons who have no interest in getting their job done. IE admin staff.

I read up on MRI and stuff – note the difference between that and a CAT scan and found that they often want to do injections. NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.

I ensured that I wasn’t wearing any metal so I didn’t have to wear one of those idiotic gowns. (Don’t know if that can be got away from if you are having a MRI on your chest, but it worked for me as they were only doing my nasal area.)

The worst thing for me was that I wear glasses and once they are off, I can’t see my hand even if it is six inches in front of me. They were playing music inside the machine so you don’t get bored, but as they were scanning my head I had earplugs and not earphones. Some bizarre amplifier was put around my head and then I got put in the machine. It makes clanging sounds while it is on so you know when you really need to keep still.

I didn’t find the process painful or uncomfortable (I was so tense I sure as hell wasn’t going to move). I don’t know how long I was there – 20 mins at a guess – the nurse knew I was nervous and promised to go as fast as possible. I imagine it could be a little uncomfortable if you had to have a larger area done but purely from a keeping still point of view.

Then came the question that I had already answered during their pre scan questions (do you have a watch on, are you pregnant) – “we want to inject you with a contrast agent to make the pictures clearer”.

Now, at this point I was still lying down with their head thing keeping me still. If any heath care professionals are reading this – do yourself a favour with a nervous patient and LET THEM UP before asking them this. I know you have to put the stuff back on them, but being unable to see and held down is never going to help your odds. Nor will “Shall I get a doctor to talk to you? AGGGHHHHHHHHHH. OK it is one step up from “talk at you” but several levels down from “talk with you”. Oh and the emotional blackmail “but if you don’t we may not find out what is wrong with you” doesn’t win you any points either. Makes me want to inject them with some compassion and common sense.

For the record, the agent is only helpful in contrasting bloody areas and so would be useless for what they were doing on me. I actually went back and asked how helpful it would be and then they got a doctor to look at the pictures. Yep, they hadn’t looked at them before asking to inject me. The verdict was that it wouldn’t help.

If you are nervous like me, STAND YOUR GROUND. They actually told me “we just like to do it for completeness”. ??????? So they deliberately wound me up even more and were prepared to waste valuable resources (an MRI cost about 600 pounds privately) for no reason.

The result was that there are enlargements of nodes, tonsils and adenoids that are due to be removed on 4th April 2005.

Today (30th March 2005) I went for my pre-op. I arrived in tears, 10 minutes late (which I hate) and alone because the person who said would go with me is an arsehole.

The meeting was in a specialist building on the hospital site (away from the main place which I think is fantastic). The receptionist I met on the ward (I was in the wrong place) was very understanding and actually took me down to the clinic. The nurse there, Kay, was great and it is a testament to her that I didn’t walk out right then.

They ran thought what I could expect and agreed to my no needles thing. The weighing and blood pressure taking was painless. I also got a small peg put on my finger but it didn’t draw blood just measured my oxygen levels so that was fine.

By the time I got to see the anesthetist I had calmed down a lot and, again she was great. Apparently I get a happy pill and then I get gas to put me under so I can avoid needles. They are going to put some cream on my hand so I don’t feel any pain from the needle that they will put in.

The only thing that I am not looking forward to is a) apparently you wake up with a breathing tube down your throat and b) a plastic tube in my hand for fluids when I wake up. I want that out ASAP.

Apparently, I have to stay in overnight but as I have to be there on ward at 7am if I get done early, I will try to escape that night if I can.

This kind of rambled off really, but I was basically writing it to give a bit of info to any other poor sod who has to do the same thing and is as wimpish as me.

I don’t for one moment thing that they will find a tumour – I am just scared of hospitals and going under. Even the subsequent pain doesn’t really bother me.

It’s nice that I don’t have to pay to have this done (about 2000 pounds) and now that it won’t be done in the main hospital building I am much happier.

The only major criticism that I have is that the original ENT consultant and the surgeon at the pre-op were not very informative as to how this will help. The surgeon at the pre-op (who isn’t operating, I checked) seemed not to have read my notes.

Someone wrote that “The most important person in my health care plan is me” I think it was American, it might have been an advert but they were bang on. Doctors, nurses etc take note. Talk with your patients – have time for them and be prepared so you give them confidence. Flex with what they want and need not what your regs say is what you should do.

I will keep you updated as I am supposed to be off work for a fortnight. Luckily my new job is being nice – I am not entitled to sick pay but they have agreed that I can take it as holiday even thought I won’t have earned that much holiday entitlement for six months.


Monday, March 28, 2005

Those Who Know Me Will Be Frightened

I am, and have been for a while, without words. Well, without words here anyway. I'm rarely speechless, or whatever you'd consider the blog equivalent. So enjoy it. No, relish it. It won't last long...I hope. To tide me over I'm including a photo I took last week. It's the view from a local hilltop. You can see the mountains in the distance. Enjoy.

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Animated short of the week. (Titanium Rhapsody)

From a time when men were megamen and pixels were megapixels.
Titanium Rhapsody by FatSatan

Next week, Rolf Harris's version.


If you are going to build a bedroom in the roof of a house, here's how it should be done.

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Dr Who

I liked it.

(There's my in depth review.)

Friday, March 25, 2005

Hidden darkness

Hmmm, it turns out that "In love with David's sister" has a hidden dark quality. Eeeek!

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Driving to cheddar (this time with words)

It was such a simple idea. I took a day off and I thought I would go to Cheddar and buy some cheese and walk up the gorge.

Last time I went there, it seemed a very simple process. Plenty of time to do all of the above and more besides. As you may have already guessed from one of my "food preparation without words" pieces, I arrived to find everywhere shut and getting dark. In short, I got lost on the way.

It was a mixture of unfamiliar wiggly roads (starting from a new place) and no longer having a partner to drive or navigate. I had to make frequent stops to check a map and there was too much cloud for the GPS to work. Gaaaaaah!

Anyway, if you are ever in Cheddar, visiting the caves or walking up the gorge, the Highnam's dairy does a rather nice line of chesse mixed with chilli and spices. I forget the name, firecracker or something. (Mention this website for no discount.)

Dispite all the hassles getting lost, it was a good day out. I managed to walk a few turns up the gorge road before it started raining and the scenery is nice.

Add your cat!

A relaxing way to spend an few hours, just clicking on the "Next Cat" button.

Cheese! (Failed)

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Animated short of the week. (In love...)

Road trip lag

I realy enjoyed that trip to Kentucky, but now I'm tired! Driving aaaallll that way will sure wear you out! ;) Ask Thia for more exciting road trip details!


Many thanks to Rori for the inspiration.

Friday, March 18, 2005

The great egg race redux.

The horribly advertising laden CCL game. I got to the second level, ho hum.

"Bring me sunshine in your smile, bring me laughter all a while...

 ...In this world where we live there should be more happiness
So much joy you can give to each brand new bright tomorrow" © Sylvia Dee / Arthur Kent

Well.. after snow earlier in the month, we've finaly got signs of spring/summer coming. The past couple of day have been quite nice an toasty and as I look through the office window a bright, warm sun is beating down - with promises of much the same over the weekend. Oh, whoopie! About blooming time too I have to say.

Earlier this week I was on a bit on a non-specific downer. No idea what caused it, no idea what happened. No idea why I'm on a high right now - could it be the weather ? Could it be too much chocolate? Could it be Central Trains and their 68% average punctuality rate? I don't know - I don't really care. I'm happy and smiling and bouncing around like a rubber ball in a very small room.

What utter nonsense. :-)

I always try to keep smiling [must get around to buying the Brian Wilson CD of the similar name] positive outlooks and all that jazz. But anyway, I've always had a soft spot for Morcambe and Wise (where the song quote at the beginning comes from, in case you didn't know) - having grown up during their hayday - always watching them on Sundays, watching celebrities making fools of themselves... it always seemed (a little) like a grown up version of the muppets... but with a distinct lack of puppetry. [of course, early shows befell the BBC's policy of sandwedging music (often jazz) into anything that could be considered "light entertainment" - but what better time to go and make a cup of tea :-) ]

Anyway, here's to sunny weather, happiness and many more days of the same.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Mad scientists for dummies.

How to destroy the earth by Sam Hughes.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Eddie Izzard's new look.

Stage Front - about Eddie Izzard as spotted by Doh, The Humanity.
(Be warned, not for polite company.)

Animated short of the week. (I only live twice)

A cute little bouncy song about death.

Friday, March 11, 2005


Thursday, March 10, 2005

The world has gone bonkers! (Part 3)

Dungeons and Dragons players in Israel's army given lower security clearance.
Throw a D12 to decide who wins.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

The world has gone bonkers! (Part 2)

IRA offer to shoot Robert McCartney's killers.
Perhaps the IRA should have decommissioned their weapons, they keep shooting themselves in the foot.

Monday, March 07, 2005

Never insult soap opera makers

A funny story, no idea if its true.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Animated short of the week. (Clubfoot)

(Something a little different this week.)
Here's a clubfoot.
There's a clubfoot.
And another little clubfoot.
Fuzzy clubfoot.
Funny clubfoot.
Clubfoot, clubfoot, duck.
Clubfoot by Pumamanor (WMV 6.1MB)

Note that the file is in WMV format, but the URL says its AVI. You may need to save the file to disk and rename it. (My copy of winamp happily plays it without renaming.)

In case you can't run it, here's a flash animation. Apparantly, last week's Hey hey 16k is better than this one.
Badger badger badger by Weebl

Legend has it that if you listen to it long enough, you will start hearing subliminal messages about recreational drugs. Zoiks!


Thy name is Metaphysik: Ball Revamped II by John Cooney.

My scores...

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Cats united?

Just wait 'till these cats divide the spoils of the hunt.

Friday, March 04, 2005

The world has gone bonkers! Part 1.

BBC shows a documentary on pornography during daytime TV.
Perhaps the BBC read this diary and decided to be a bit more adventurous in scheduling.

Four babies on trial for criminal damage.
Damage to my ears, maybe.

Sweet maker stops production of dead animal sweets.
Mmmmm yummy.

What do people want to buy?

  Being bored and hopping onto ebay I noticed the new "pulse"...

The "ebay pulse" tells you what the most popular things people are looking for, watching, etc... now... When I looked, the most popular searches were...

  1. cds
  2. cd
  3. 12
  4. dvds
  5. dvd
  6. 4
  7. 5
  8. 7
  9. tops
  10. top

[all calculated by "number of searches"]
cds, tops, dvds - I can understand. These are logical things to want to buy. But, the numbers 12,4,5 and 7? are people bonkers? [in case they are, I've a "number 12" that I'll sell quite cheaply... ]

Thursday, March 03, 2005

A look in the logs (February 2005)

It's a new month, its still snowing, so it must be time for another peek in the server log files for February.

Only three search engines appeared this month. First up is MSN search, who gave you...
additional mood
animated cartoon tree
animated dancing people
animated jokes
animated llamas
baby rolling over
bad ass wrestler
bananas burnt
bermuda triangle reasons
bill bailey love song
bob ricci-she blocked me
candle phobia
Cartoon image keys
cartoon pics of the earth
catch phrases
chalk and chips
cut out carbs after 5
do americans have jelly on thier toast
elektra game
elektra movie
elektra movie play
evil teletubbies
Famous catch phrases
free tungsten t3 games
funny photos regarding pope john paul
funny songs about toast
God, am I going to get my wish?
good news bad news jokes
how do i see if someone has blocked me
how do you use a web cam
i love magical trevor
lip reading games
llama cartoon picture
llama song
magical trevor mp3
magician jokes
motivation used by supermarkets
musical celebrities are more popular than politicians
my first sex with gay
never mind the buzzcocks
no sense of smell sue to flu cold
personal web cam
pics of chocolates
picture of lips
picture of sex conception girl
psion blog
rate adult photos
rate my ass
rate my over 50
resturant toilets
sex diary
swindon schools closed due to snow
the llama song
The plain pub company limited
this morning daytime tv
unrequited love
unrequited love blog love him girlfriend
Waitress adverts
what does mwah mean
whats new pussycat
why don't you?
zombie car advert
(And 62 variations of... free girl Celebrity gay asian mom adult back door home web live sex cam picture pics)

And from Google...
"she blocked me" samb main site
+psion +battery +backup +loose
4300 rd
bob ricci
buying condoms
change condom sizing
chocolate concrete recipe
finding drewmo
magical trevor
mikey georgeson
natasha kaplinski
penguin calls drewmo
richard heathfield
run a zx81 via usb
SHE BLOCKED ME by samb words
smear screen palm tungsten
songs by Burton Ernie
spyware maker
The Incredibly Stupid Diary of Bill psion
The Llama Song by Burton Ernie words
words for SHE BLOCKED me by samb
And one hit from AOL search, looking for "redundacy".

In all, there were 15307 server hits, coming from 923 distinct IP addresses. Here are the top 10 IPs in terms of server hits...
  • At 10 with 135 hits, a Colt France user.
  • At 9 with 144 hits, an Eclipse address.
  • At 8 with 146 hits, a second Eclipse address.
  • At 7 with 154 hits, a third Eclipse address.
  • At 6 with 163 hits, a Bellsouth user on the Atlanta hub.
  • At 5 with 204 hits, a user of Comnet in New Zealand.
  • At 4 with 419 hits, a Comcast user on thier Tennesee hub.
  • At 3 with 521 hits, a fourth Eclipse address.
  • At 2 with 969 hits, a user at Bookham Technologies.
  • Top with 1231 hits, a user at Coventry University.

And what did they ask for? Here are the top 10 most requested files...The most requested file doesn't exist. Oh joy.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

"Got a gun, it can change the weather....

...but it only works if you stick it together" "Monkey's Birthday" ©1994 Georgeson.

Another week of heavy snow, bright sunshine, rain, wind ... and that's just me. And they're worrying about asian bird flu pandemics ... Snow in March. March in snow. Expected April, May and June in snow.

See... "Global warming" has a downside.

The snow doesn't even settle long enough for us to have fun with it.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Advanced fat bandage?

As spotted in some junk spam e-mail...
My pills is an advanced fat-bandage supplement that removes grease from a nutrition we dine! Explicated with the strong grease-adhere filament, the medley of all-natural constituents...

I'll buy some!